The other day I was sitting on my office, sifting through the four hundred thousand e-mails I somehow receive between the time I go home and arrive the next morning, and came upon this doosey. It was a memo sent though the training division of a particular office, who shall remain unnamed. The memo had been sent to high level executives, as well as hundreds of other employees throughout the establishment, advising them of a computer based training program they were required to complete.
This in itself is pretty unremarkable, I’m sure many of you living out there in cubicle heaven have received similar directives. But take a look at his letter, keeping in mind that it came from an education department, and tell me if you don’t find the wording a bit… unusual.
All,
I need all those that have came to XXXXXXXX AFTER the month of
June to get to this site (below) and take some training. I need this to get
done ASAP to close out my year end log. Once training is complete, get me a
copy of the graduation. Below are the list for who needs to take
what course.
I’m wanting this closed out by Jan 12. Let me know if you have any
questions.
After I finished reading it, what else could I say but, “Wow.” If this is an example of the education department’s intellect, imagine what the rest of the company’s capable of. My only suggestion would be to promote this person into a position where their talents can really shine, like advertising or public relations. This person would be an ideal choice to handle the press release when they get hit with one of those pesky alien abductions.
To be fair, I am not saying this person is stupid. I didn’t even mean to imply hillbillies are stupid (I just thought it was a catchy title). I’m just saying if you’re going to send a memo out to half the world, you might want to have someone read it over. Maybe someone versed in more than a single syllable vocabulary.
Anyway, best wishes for the New Year and may you find your next interdepartmental memo as humorous as I found this one. When was the last time you read something that made you say “wow?” I would love to hear your stories.
LOL! That was great! :) The last thing I read that made me say "wow" was a spam email that was supposed to be "officially" telling me "do send your bank information so you can do keep your internet form being discontinued. If you do not send billing information for your internet account I will be forced to cancel the internet suddenly."
ReplyDeleteYeah, ok pal. I forward the email to Comcast. I mean, if you're gonna try to scam me out of my cash, you could at least pretend you're semi-intelligent!
I receive a number of spam e-mails every day, but I particularly enjoy the ones from people offering to pleasure body parts I do not possess. I would have to say, however, that my most favorite "wow" moment came from a note I received some years back. The ENTIRE NOTE was one sentence, each thought joined with the word "and". Here is an excerpt, spelling and grammar unretouched: "I don't like what you writ and I don't think you unnerstand what reel people go throu and I fill sorry for yor huzbind who haf to live wit sombody lik you and I think you ar a bad writr ..." It was the best hate mail I've ever received.
ReplyDelete*lol* PR or Advert? Whoever wrote that email is clearly on management track!
ReplyDelete@Ninja and Bertha. Those are hilarious. Sometimes it's worth getting the scam/hate mail just to enjoy the comedy of it. @Celynne. I think you might be on to something. They would certainly be a good fit for our management team LOL.
ReplyDeleteIt is not even January 2012 anymore and this made me laugh my butt off. It also made me afraid of the grammar police and then, I wondered, if I ever worked at this company. I wondered this, because I have honestly worked for the world's dumbest ... not true (but yeah, not in cubicle land anymore and quite frankly, loving it!) Thanks for the laugh ... ;-)
ReplyDeleteGreat post! When I was working for a traditional publisher, I often cringed while reading internal e-mails.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the Twitter follow, and I hope you'll check out my blog as well. Looking forward to reading more of yours!
--Candace @ChangeItUpEditing.com
Now that's just funny. Poor education system. I also love how the sentences are broken up like mangled poetry.
ReplyDelete